Tuesday, February 17, 2009

My Valentine

Sam gave me this valentine.....for those of you who can't read "6 year old" it says "I love you cause you stay home with me." I cried when I read it because it was so sweet! I said to him "But mommy doesn't stay home with you every day, do you wish mommy stayed home with you every day" and my beautiful son said "No Mommy, God needs you to help other kids sometimes. Besides, I have to go to school and I LOVE to play with my friends at daycare it is so much fun. I think it is just right, and we have so much fun when you stay home. I love you".
Gosh, I love that kid.

It's interesting because this is one of those things I think us women are hardest on each other about - and boy can we be catty and judgemental. I'm not really sure why, if it is because we all feel the need to defend the decision we made or what - which is just silly. No one should have to do that - because not one of us knows all of the reasons that each family has for making their individual decisions. For us, I work partially because I have to and in many ways it isn't a choice, but, I also love and feel passionately about my work and see it as a calling, and can't imagine NOT doing it. That doesn't mean I love my children any less. (It may mean my house isn't always picture perfect...hey.. I'm not superwoman after all :) ) So we work it out. I stay at home a little, I work, I rarely miss one of their important events and I make sure we have quality time together. In many ways I am a better mom because I work, because after a day of work I'm thrilled and excited to see them and can't wait to spend time with them. It works for me, but it doesn't mean it works for everyone. It's hard to explain. That statement doesn't work for everyone, so I wouldn't try to place that value, that works in our family and our situation on anyone else. It's interesting, for a long time I've wished that it could be a choice in our family - that I didn't HAVE to work - and have coveted some situations where that was the case. As life progresses I began to wonder if I really did have a choice if I would choose any different? Hmmm... I don't really know.


  1. So true. We all sacrifice to do what we feel is inspired for our family, and it's so sad that we as women judge each other (as if we could possibly know)! I think this is true about having children too. No one can presume to know another's situation or what God has whispered in someone else's ear. Sam's Valentine was precious. :)

  2. I think the best give we give our children is a happy mom (or a happy dad whatever the case may be) - and the means to that is different for every person, so we all need to quit judging each other!